Love is not forceful. Love doesn’t have to be forceful. Love is patient and it is also intuitive. Love makes room for people to be who they are without the assumption that they mean me harm. Love is giving room when things feel too restrictive. Love is understanding that sometimes reflective silence is what the space and the moment may need. Love is feeling hurt and disappointed and being okay with that in the moment BUT it’s also letting it go when things are rectified. Love is standing in the space of positive thoughts and well wishes when you may be unclear. Love is easy. Love is a breeze. Love has no limits, no time constraints, no concept nor need for making something work because it will simply work. The human condition is to put our expectations, experiences and stuff in the space. Those things are vital for a connection but it doesn’t overshadow love. Love grows organically and it expands so much when we get out of our own way.
I’ve been having crazy insomnia. I am feeling like a zombie in my body but my mind is actually doing okay. I have so much on my mind, so many choices to make and I am a little unclear which route I should take. I’m also thinking of my friend who passed 6 years ago. His death anniversary always sends me into a frenzy. The circumstances surrounding his death are legit things that keep me up at night. I’m also worried about something beyond my control. But like all nurturers I can’t help but think about all that could be wrong and wondering how I could support. I am in this space of worry. I’m so concerned about all the things that I absolutely have zero control over and it’s hounding my mind and hurting my heart. Let’s stop this right here.
I AM the clearing for ease, peace, patience and comfort. There’s nothing wrong. My friend has died AND he walks with me. He doesn’t leave my side and I feel him always. My worry about my personal choices will be cleared up when I honor what I know I want for my future. I set a powerful intention and I feel like the only way I could honor it is by walking the road that is less conventional and a space for abundance and transformation. I AM going to choose a powerful pathway and it will lead to lessons and growth. I know this. I’m staying the course. I am also going to walk a path of peace and patience when it comes to my heart space. The agreement was made. I am honoring myself and my end of the agreement. The other person will honor theirs. Time will reveal the rest and there’s nothing more for me to do.
I, like everyone else I know can get lost in our thoughts and our foolish ass ego. It’s really easy for me to see all the things that aren’t working and what things should look like so that I could avoid feeling pain. But that shit that I do comes from a past based experience and while I’m not going to throw caution to the wind, I’m also not going to sabotage myself by imposing old ways of being on something and someone new. Life is good. I’m good. In this moment as I sit to write this blog, my heart feels full. I had a beautiful day yesterday. The people who I were with make me feel like I’m a billionaire. I am so blessed to know and be a party of a tribe who can honor me and love me so much. I am so thankful. I am grateful for the energy and time spent in the hours before my birthday and the moments right into the sunrise. I can’t even think of anything else that I could need right now. It all went the way it was supposed to and I’m thankful for that. I’m good. I’m at peace. There is a joyous time and embrace it.
Raw Motherfunking Emotions 