Bumble the dating app–I’m into that shit. The women have all the power, we make the first move, we pick who we want and we take it from there. Bumble is the shit. I was skeptical at first because Money Man told me it was okay because STALLION told him it was good. Initially when I got on, I adjusted my settings to see if I would find either of them and low and behold Stallion was right there in my matches. Ha. Weird as fuck but anyway, I wanted to give Bumble a real shot to see who was out here and what I could learn from this enticing and scary ass dating app.
The minute and I literally mean 1-5 minutes into me creating my profile, I had like 45 matches. I was like ummmmm this algorithm is off, there’s no way it could be that fast, right? Uhhhhh wrong. That shit was legit but it was all kinds of dudes, all kinds of ages, all kinds of ethnicities and all kinds of looks. I didn’t want all kinds of anything. I had to adjust the age because I don’t want any 20 something year olds UNLESS we are just having sex and maybe just maybe have a fun day at the beach or some shit. I had to filter the other direction too because I don’t want to date anyone 55 years old and over because UMMMMM no, I don’t want no DAddy who is literally as old as my own parents. That’s not appealing to me at all. I also had to filter young ones and the older guys who didn’t have kids. If you can recall my really passionate post NO MORE KIDS y’all know I don’t want no more, so those guys had to go. The other types of filtering had to come with engagement and conversation. Can y’all take a wild fucking guess what other filtering I had to do? Aight well let me tell you….THE FETISH MOTHERFUCKERS. The guys who wanna fuck black girls and that’s it, or the ones who wanna try dating black girls but their family has Klan lineage or the ones who wanna just suck my toes, and the ones who are creeping because their wives won’t fuck them and the ones who JUST wanna fuck because they are oh sooooo horny. 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Once I filtered all that, I was left with a decent dating pool. They ranged from cops (who I am weary of), doctors, lawyers, finance dudes, comedians, entrepreneurs, and you name it. I matched with divorced men, dads, men looking to date seriously and some looking for marriage. They range between 36 and 47 and some look fucking good for their age and others not so much. All kids of body types, and overall dope men looking to meet me. The question that frustrates me and makes me want to scream is “So do you date white men?” BITCH we fucking matched didn’t we? Like what the fuck you think? Obviously. It’s 2018 and we are in a crazy America BUT this is also the NorthEast, who doesn’t or hasn’t dated outside of their race? Apparently many people BUT a lot of us have and I recently started again and I like that shit. It’s fun and it’s different AND people are people at their core and as long as you are absolutely fundamentally opposed to oppression, inequity and the violation of anyone’s civil liberties then I can fuck with you. I don’t ask for much and honestly as time goes by, I’ll lure you in and get you onboard with all my projects, so if you’re dating me you world is about to be transformed. Believe that.
Bumble has been good. I like maybe 5-6 ppl right now and I have already had two dates and a couple next week. I matched with an old school flame. Ha ha, a friend I met a decade ago. We flirted, we laughed, but we never did anything. We have a date next week. I’m excited about that. It’s my mission to enjoy my single life. I’m young, I’m cute, I’m fly and I’m open to idea of meeting someone who will be goood for right now or for a lifetime. It’s my goal to be joyfully audacious in every way possible and to be my best self in this dating process. I’m not trying to be anyone’s kitten or thing that they do. My goal is to connect and to see how life can grow us and leave us better than before we met. If anyone knows the owner of Bumble, let her know that she’s the shit and I appreciate her vision. She is doing it perfectly right and I thank her for this dope ass platform.
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