I’m reeling this morning and I feel like if I don’t talk about it I’m going to lose my shit. Twice in two months I start talking to a seemingly nice guy on Bumble, we exchange pleasantries and talk about a variety of things INCLUDING marital status. The convos go so well that we move to texting and then, naturally, plans to hang out. Both guys, 24 hours after really chatting reveal that they are not only married but have THREE children. Two separate guys, two different states, both in “loveless” and “sexless” marriages with three children a piece. They stop themselves and they drop the news like a ton of bricks…they can’t go on, they can’t bear it, I’m lovely and amazing and more than they bargained for….but they just cannot continue…unless I said it was okay.
It’s not okay. This is why I open with how tall are you AND are you married or with someone??! What the fuck dude? Be honest about your infidelity and you can see who will entertain your bullshit BUT don’t misrepresent yourself. Don’t say you’re single, when you’re married or with someone. Stuff like that is why people lose their minds and there is no trust. Far too many people are out here cheating, lying and fronting like they are single but they have partners who may not know about their bullshit or maybe they do know and they are doing their own thing too. Ethical non monogamy is a thing, aight but I feel like I need to see a notarized contract from your partner and I wanna talk to her so I can make sure that she’s good with this AND you’re not making up no bullshit. It’s not a non ethical monogamous situation IF you decide that for yourself and maybe had a couple conversations but your partner didn’t actually agree. That’s not non ethical monogamy.
So, should these two motherfuckers get praise because they came clean before we actually went out? Maybe. But they shouldn’t have made the bumble account to begin with. That was a choice. You actually made a profile, went through all of the trouble to do that, swiped right on god knows how many people AND you chatted, engaged and traded numbers. You did all that before you felt bad and confessed. I get it. I understand the issue. I know the monotony is real BUT create new beginnings with your partner and not with someone else. You ain’t shit for that. It’s fucking wack. I am so disgusted and annoyed today and more skeptical than ever because so many people fucking lie and say shit that is unreal and just fallacy. Be decent human beings, stay the fuck off Bumble and talk to your spouses. Jeez. Y’all ain’t shit.