The saying is usually right person, wrong time but if they were the right person, the time would be right, right? I believe we meet the right person at the right time for that specific lesson at that time.The universe brings us these people as mirrors of ourselves and we either learn the lesson being presented or we fall into our vicious cycles. The right person will be vibrating on a frequency that’s equal to yours. They will evoke the unhealed parts of you that need to come out, and you get to decide if you’re ready to do the work or continue on the path you’ve been on.
I know for a fact that some people feel like perfection and even soul mates. These people are the ones who hear us and also really listen. They see us and they love us despite our imperfections. These people see us at our weakest, most vulnerable and at our ugliest and they stay to see more. These people also show us who they are and we love them for it. When you encounter someone who you can be your best, worst and ugliest with and they still want you, that feeling is what most seek their entire lives. This feels like the zenith of what love is supposed to be. You feel like you want for nothing in that moment because you’ve found a love that has cracked you open, stretched you and made you feel validated, acknowledged and whole.
Until one day something happens. You’ll be carrying along in your bliss, but a bit of the honeymoon stage has worn off and you notice a feeling. There’s something in your gut that’s speaking to you, and you try desperately to silence it. You walk and smile like it’s an ordinary day, but in your heart and in your soul there’s something awry. You begin to notice patterns that you’d overlooked before, but now it’s impossible to not see. You hear words differently than before and now you’re really paying attention. The things that used to feel like magic, feel a lot more ordinary and the feeling like you want to be together forever starts to fade. The rose colored glasses start coming off and you begin to observe a reality that is pretty devastating. This person is not the right one for you, and this is not the right time for this relationship.
Nobody is at fault here. You can’t expect to know something that you didn’t know was going to arise. This feeling in your gut that you’ve reached the end of the road, and you don’t want to face it. You know that everything felt so beautiful and to think about that coming to an end is absolutely excruciating. It’s hard for us to let go of the expectations, and dreams we created for ourselves when we thought we found the right person. But what is more devastating would be to stay past the time that we know has expired. Sometimes there are no fights, crazy arguments or bad blood. Sometimes the time is just up and you will know this intuitively in your heart and you MUST honor that feeling.
The outcome of letting go of the wrong person, is making room for the right one, at the right time. Sometimes the right person, is you needing to choose yourself. A broken relationship should cause you to self reflect, self audit and work on being the best version of yourself. A part of recognizing our growth, is seeing where we let go of the things that do not serve our best selves. It is also about leveling up from your last relationship and learning what works for next time. Every single person is here to teach us a valuable lesson, and it is up to us to learn and apply it to our lives. The timing for that relationship was actually right on time, and it was with the right person. The right time doesn’t have to mean forever and I believe that’s where we break our own hearts.
What is life if we do not love truly, madly and deeply? What is this existence if we do not feel incredible love followed by incredible sorrow? What are we here for if we did not love and then lose love? It must happen, and we are much better for it. Pain is what helps us appreciate healing. A broken heart is a heart that has expanded, learned, and has room for more life and lessons. Count your blessings because you are one of the lucky ones who has seen the zenith of love. You’re lucky because you’ve seen the bottomless pits of heartbreak and you came back from that even better. You are in the right place and this is the right time!
“The right person will be vibrating on a frequency that’s equal to yours. They will evoke the unhealed parts of you that need to come out, and you get to decide if you’re ready to do the work or continue on the path you’ve been on” –
I just came to the realization that this was the reason for my last relationship. I kept asking … Why was he brought into my life?? I thought he was the one because he was different than any man I’d ever experienced..so of course I thought he was the one! But in the end I realized I had work to do..and he came to show me what that things I thought were healed…were not in fact..HEALED.
Thanks for sharing sistar. You are one of my favorite people in this world.
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Pat, you remain one of my favorites forever. I know, we meet men who are way better than the ones before and it feels incredible BUT then we notice, something is off. While there could be something wrong with them, that’s besides the point. The bigger picture is the lesson that WE have to learn. Each time we are learning how to love ourselves deeper and that is really the best gift ever. Thank you for making my day.
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